All in the Kool-aid

I’ve picked up this annoying habit of eavesdropping. It’s not intentional. I just happen to be in the vicinity and overhear wild ish when I’m out. I also have an insane memory when it comes to details.

So I’m at my favorite place the Cheesecake Factory on my first real night out since my unfortunate ankle operation.  I’m there with a group of my friends.  There’s a guy standing by my bench.  He winds up standing behind me while I’m sipping on my white Moscato in the overflow room, and he chats up with this young lady.  No biggie.

At first their conversation was pretty trite. Just your basic giggling, first-meet information exchange. I zone out to watch the men go by. The QC men dress up to go to the club. I mean like in suits and ties and pastel sweaters. I think they’re way overdressed, but I’m a sucker for a man in a suit.

So I guess there’s enough mutual interest between the pair in front of me to continue the conversation another time. From the conversation, I figure that she’s had his phone and punched her number in. Now here’s where things get interesting.

Him: I have to figure out what number to give you.

Her: Number?

Him: Yeah. The best a girl can get a first meeting is a seven.

Her: A seven? Like on a scale of 1-10?

Him: Yeah. 7.

Her: So uh, how do I get to a 10?

Him: Well that depends.

Her: On?

Him: Your conversation and your sex.

Her: [Pause] My sex?

Him: Yeah. How good it is and how fast I get it.

Her: [Pause.]

(I actually turned around and looked at both of them with the YUK FACE at this point. I couldn’t believe I was hearing this.)

Her: [Giggle] Cool.


They share another 30 seconds of small talk. He offers to buy her friends some drinks, her overflow bell goes off, then she leaves with the beverages. Ten seconds later, another chick is in his face. I look around and see that there is an informal line of women waiting to get this guy’s attention. I mean he’s okay, kinda short for my taste, (now that I’m into a taller man) but the body is sick and he is very brown. (Brown + muscles = happy Camron.) But this guy is a d*ck.

I slide over on my bench  up and convey the conversation to Roderick; one of my friends who came with me, who’s standing in front of me. I’m re-telling what I heard like all I cannot believe these are lines that chicks are putting up with.

Roderick is baffled to… until I point out the guy that said it.

“Him?” he asks, nodding slightly in the guy’s direction.

I nod back.

Roderick chuckles. “That’s {Panthers Player.} He’s got a 50 million dollar contract.”

I pause on that one for a minute wondering if it’s supposed to make a difference.

Nah.. not even for $50 mil could I let a guy disrespect me like that.

Well his bell chimes, and he goes in.

A couple minutes later, I’m still sitting on my bench. These two guys come in and take a position next to me. They’re just out to chill I’m assuming and to shoot the sh*t, (ie, gossip. Men love to gossip.) So one asks the other if he’s been in touch with a mutual friend.

“Nah. I ain’t seeing too much of him now. He and [the wife] are having problems.”

The first guy inquires into what problems exactly. The second guy says it’s not his place to speak on it.

I respect this.

The first guy asks if it’s serious enough for divorce as the couple haven’t been married long.

The second guy makes the first guy promise (like we’re in second grade) not to repeat the story he’s about to tell.

So it seems their boy’s wife confessed that she was still in love with her ex-husband. Of course, this info messes up their boy to no end. In retaliation, he cheats. The wife finds the numbers of some chicks in his phone, calls and confirms that the husband is cheating with these women. Now everything’s gone to shit.

“Wow,” says the first guy. “He must be fucked up. I’d be if my girl said some ish like that to me.”

I love how they skipped over the him cheating part like that wasn’t the big deal too.

“I told him not to marry her so quick,” says the second guy. “I told him there wasn’t a big hurry.”

“So why’d they do it so fast?”

“Man,” says second guy with a big sigh. “He found out she made over 100 and wanted to lock it down.”

“What?” says first guy.



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